Billy Collins & Validation

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Last night, my friend Elyse and I ventured downtown to hear Billy Collins, my favorite poet, read at the Pantages Theatre.

He read for about an hour, a lot of new stuff from Aimless Love, his new book (I read all the new poems in one sitting– I can do that for no other poet than Billy Collins) but also some old favorites like “The Revenant” and “The Lanyard.”

If you’re not familiar with Billy Collins, please come out from under the dark rock you’re living beneath (I kid, I kid!).  No, but really, in case you didn’t know, Billy Collins is a brilliant and hilarious poet.  Hearing him read live is such a treat for his deadpan delivery.  Elyse remarked, “It’s like attending a comedy event … but a really highbrow one.”

We laughed and laughed and laughed– and then made those soft sighs and murmurs that follow poignant poems.

Afterward, he had a very short Q&A session (which he called a conversation) wherein he said (and I’m paraphrasing as best I can here), “If you read great work and feel appreciative, you’re not a writer.  Writers read and feel a burning jealousy.”

YES!  I was so just discussing this on my blog.

It was a delightful evening with delightful company.  Elyse and I were some of the youngest people in the audience, and I felt bad for the rest of my generation that was spending their Friday without Billy.

Click this image to link to the book's Goodreads page.

Click this image to link to the book’s Goodreads page.

 

 

Dear Diary (October 2013, Part Two)

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octoberparttwoWhoa.  So October was kinda crazy.  (TOO crazy for this introvert!)

I taught four college classes all about OCD.  Two were biblical counseling classes and two were abnormal psychology classes.  I’m so grateful to the professors at my university for allowing me to share my story!  I also was a part of an OCD Awareness Week event in Minneapolis, where I was invited to read an excerpt from my first novel, Lights All Around.

I took part in a panel on mental illness for a breakout chapel at Northwestern.  OCD, ADHD, Bipolar, and GAD were all represented!  And then, that evening, I was able to get coffee with a very special family. Their sweet 11-year-old daughter developed a sudden onset of OCD a few months ago (PANDAS, you suck), and we’ve been communicating about Exposure and Response Prevention therapy, a journey this brave girl is tackling!  I am so, so impressed with them– with the parents’ drive to do the research to help them understand what their daughter is going through and with their daughter, for her maturity and courage and tenacity (and brio!).

My friend Addie Zierman’s new book came out, and Northwestern hosted a reading and Q&A with her.  (So proud!)  The next evening, Rainbow Rowell did a reading and Q&A in St. Paul.  Friday, I have tickets to see Billy Collins at the Pantages!  (I love how literary the Twin Cities are!)

I got my first rejection from an editor this month.  Truest is still in the hands of five other editors, and I am essentially heartsick with longing for a book deal.  It was so comforting to hear Rainbow Rowell discuss how difficult it was to sell Eleanor and Park, which is a masterpiece.  (A relief because, you know, then maybe that means my book is under-appreciated masterpiece, right?  Faulty logic?  I can’t hear you!)

I’ve been writing one thousand words a day of my new manuscript: mysterious boy, small island, need I say more?

I finished up my fall travel for off-campus recruitment, which included high school visits, college fairs, and presentations (presentations was essentially the theme of my October; I believe I gave ten, all told).  It feels good to have fall travel done so that I can be on campus and in my office for students.

I’m getting antsy to go somewhere: I’d really like to do some sort of writing retreat or conference.  Tossing around the idea of the SCBWI conference next summer, but that feels so far away!

One more thing: I’m working on a new project with Elyse Kallgren of the Inksplotch blog.  We will likely unveil it right around Christmas.

Best Books on Writing

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Okay, today’s Top Ten Tuesday theme was “Scariest-Looking Book Covers,” and since I generally don’t purchase (or read) those, I thought I’d do my own thing today!

Therefore, I present to you some of my favorite books on writing:

writing books collage

Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott | The ultimate book about the writing life!

The Writing Life by Annie Dillard | So much yes.

Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg | Even if you don’t agree with her Zen teachings, you have much to learn from her methods: “Ten minutes.  Go.”  It’s gotten me through many writing slumps!

A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller | How to not just write but live a great story.

Wild Mind & Thunder and Lightning (and really anything writing-related) by Natalie Goldberg | More deliciousness.

Zen in the Art of Writing by Ray Bradbury

Walking on Water by Madeleine L’Engel | Reflections on faith and art

For the Next Time I Start Writing a New Novel

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Dear Jackie,

By the time you start writing your next novel, you will have forgotten a few things, and in those moments, I hope you’ll come back to this post and be reminded.

* Writing a novel is hard.  The beginning stages kind of suck.  You barely know your characters until you’ve written the whole first draft, and so for a couple months, you’re essentially writing blind.  You forget that.  In those difficult days of editing, you think longingly of the “carefree” days of freewriting, having forgotten that you felt completely lost and simultaneously terrified that you were wasting your time.

* This is just what it is like at the start of a new novel.  You feel lost and lonely, and every scene feels stilted and confused.  You haven’t yet figured out your character’s deep-seated desires, let alone their surface ones, and you certainly aren’t aware of their secrets and many of their motivations.  You will.  You just need to spend time with them.  That’s how you get to know any new friend.

* It all seems so touch-and-go at the start.  You feel sort of committed to your idea, kind of committed to the characters.  Everything seems masterful in your head, and then the moment you start to type it out, it feels thin and aimless.  That’s because it is thin and aimless– for now— but that is just what it’s like at the start of a new novel.  At least for you.

* One thousand words each day will get you one thousand words a day closer to a completed first draft.  And when you force yourself to show up and sit down, your characters will show up too, and that’s essentially the only way you’re going to get them to spill their guts to you.  So keep showing up.

* First drafts are meant to be terrible.

* You don’t see most writers’ first drafts, just like most people won’t see yours.  So calm down.

* Remember that E.L. Doctorow quote?  “Writing a novel is like driving a car at night. You can only see as far as your headlights, but you can make the whole trip that way.”  Those are someone else’s words explaining your experience, because, really, it’s quite universal.  Remember that.

* Sometimes you’ll go down rabbit holes that lead nowhere.  Even if there aren’t novels down there, there are still lessons.

* Pumps need to be primed.

* Quit complaining to everyone and go write one thousand more words.

Love,

Jackie Lea, who is fumbling in the darkness of the beginnings of a first draft and wanted to remind future Jackie Lea of what it is like

headlights

Follow Me on Facebook!

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In an effort to develop some sort of boundaries, I’ve created a writer page for myself on Facebook.  I’ll now be limiting my personal Facebook page primarily to friends I know in real life.  (To my readers who are already my Facebook friends, I want us to remain friends … you’ve, in a sense, become “real life” friends to me.)

Internet friends, blogging friends, and real life friends, you’re all invited to like my writer page at facebook.com/jackieleawrites (or just click the image below) to keep up with my writing and blogging life!

LAA square

Narnia and Uncertainty

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In my lowest OCD years, uncertainty appeared to be my enemy, and I attempted to avoid it at all costs.

It was a losing fight since we cannot. avoid. uncertainty.

Now that I’ve switched teams and am an official cheerleader for uncertainty, I notice it in the positive sense now.  No longer the terrifying stranger, creeping around the corners, I now see it as the exciting flash of risk stealing a smile my way.

“I know what it is,” said Peter; “it’s a beaver.  I saw the tail.”

“It wants us to go to it,” said Susan, “and it is warning us not to make a noise.”

“I know,” said Peter.  “The question is, are we to go to it or not?  What do you think, Lu?”

“I think it’s a nice beaver,” said Lucy.

“Yes, but how do we know?” said Edmund.

“Shan’t we have to risk it?” said Susan.  “I mean, it’s no good just standing here and I feel I want some dinner.”

For twenty years, I feared uncertainty.  And Susan was right: it was no good just standing there.

P.S. The risk was worth it, and dinner was great.

beavers

Review: How to Love by Katie Cotugno

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how to loveOh my gosh, loved this.  I tore through Katie Cotugno’s debut novel in only a couple days!

This is a young adult contemporary novel, and it’s told in alternating chapters of “before” and “after”– that is, before Reena’s boyfriend/baby daddy vanished for two years and after he came back in her and their daughter’s life.  Interestingly, my novel Truest also does this back-and-forth thing, but it felt different than mine.  How to Love was equal parts before and after, whereas the bulk of my novel is the before– the after is just tiny glimpses.  Anyway, it was fascinating to watch how another novelist made this work for her so well.  The hard thing about it though was switching back and forth.  Just when I’d really get into either the before or after, we’d switch.  Still, it drove the novel forward.

How to Love is really the story of Reena and Sawyer– but also a story about family and about failed friendships and secrets and drugs and ohmygosh really enjoyed this.  If you like contemporary, go! Read!  Enjoy!

P.S. If you do read this one, let me know.  I have a couple things I want to discuss with someone!