I tried to explain my way out of it, any way I could. Maybe because these curses were just in my head and not outloud they didn’t truly meet the “criteria” for blasphemy of the Spirit. And then there was always the confusing line in the Mark 3 passage:
28 o“Truly, I say to you, all sins will be forgiven the children of man, and whatever blasphemies they utter, 29 but whoever pblasphemes against the Holy Spirit never has forgiveness, but is guilty of an eternal sin”—30 for they were saying, “He has an unclean spirit.”
For they were saying, “He has an unclean spirit.” Now, what did that mean? That it wasn’t really a word spoken against the Spirit that was the condemning act? That it was, in fact, something else– the attributing of the Holy Spirit’s works to Satan.
Well, that’s like laying out a feast for OCD. It jumped all over it. Almost immediately I began to doubt if Jesus was really who He said He was. I let my mind go so far that I started to wonder if Jesus might really be Satan in disguise.
Now I was sure I was condemned. One way or the other, I must have committed the unforgivable sin! Any way you cut that cake, you’d find hell in the center.
I was devastated, hopeless. Have you been there? Are you there now? Leave a comment. I want to encourage you– because there IS still hope. My life has turned around, and in spite of OCD, I am confident that my heart belongs to Christ.