Here are some OCD-related questions I’ve been asked by blog readers. As always, keep in mind that I’m not a doctor or a therapist, just an OCD survivor. (Note: I’ve been using the term “OCD survivor” a little bit lately, and sometimes I wonder if I “deserve” to use the term survivor— but I remember that OCD is an incurable disorder, a medical illness, and hellish torment. I’m gonna own that survivor title.)
How have medication and therapy worked hand in hand to help you?
The two of them were a dynamic duo for me back in 2008, when I underwent exposure therapy (if you’re new to this blog and don’t know what ERP or exposure and response prevention therapy is, WELCOME! You can read a lot more about this at http://www.jackieleasommers.com/OCD.). Medication, in a way, got me into a place where I was able to approach ERP. Then ERP was the heavy lifting. Since then, medication continues to keep me on the right track.
Everyone has differing thoughts on medication, but all experts agree that ERP is the number one treatment for OCD.
An imperfect metaphor: if ERP is the playing field, meds can sometimes be the bus. The real work, the real healing, happens on the playing field, but you have to be there. For some of us, we can’t get to the playing field without riding the bus. The way our bodies work won’t allow us to get there on our own.
How does OCD compare to other common mental illnesses when it comes to treatment (therapy, medication, etc.)?
This is such a great question and worthy of someone so much wiser than I am. That said, I will say that ERP is not your standard “talk therapy”– you know what I mean, right? ERP is not talking about your feelings one hour a week. It’s doing real homework every day– exposures, things that are tremendously uncomfortable– and moving on to more uncomfortable things. It’s not about being reassured or a pat on the back, and it makes you feel worse before you feel better.
But then.
Something clicks.
And everything changes.
How has OCD shaped your faith? Did you ever feel OCD was stealing your faith away with you kicking and screaming? Did you ever feel your faith wouldn’t recover? Was there ever a point where you feared you believed the OCD lies?
Likewise, If you could narrow it down to one generalization, what’s the biggest impact in your opinion that OCD has had regarding your faith?
OCD goes after what is important to a person. For me, that is my faith. Sometimes people worry about telling me the details of their obsessive themes– but, honestly, it’s hard to imagine that my mind hasn’t already gone there. I turn 35 next month. Twenty of those 35 years were spent cycling through religious obsessions. If it had to do with God or sin or heaven or hell or Jesus or … I’ve battled through it. Did I feel like OCD was stealing my faith? Yes. How did OCD shape my faith? It made it into an enslaved mockery of what faith should really look like. Did I worry my faith wouldn’t recover? Constantly. And did I believe the lies? Yes. Or enough to change my behavior, enough to ruin things, enough to no longer find enjoyment in the one who embodies joy.
One giant generalization for the way OCD impacted my faith: it enslaved me in a cage of lies.
One giant generalization for the way ERP impacted my faith: it freed me to understand the truth of grace.
God didn’t change in all this. But the way my brain is wired did, and that changed the way I relate to my unchanging God.
I know people can’t be “a little OCD,” but what about people who have obsessive-compulsive tendencies but aren’t diagnosed with OCD? Do you have advice/thoughts for that?
If the obsessive-compulsive tendencies don’t hurt, then I would encourage you to enjoy your quirkiness!
If they hurt, well, you might have OCD. Get that diagnosis and begin exposure therapy.
I would like you to describe your experiencing with OCD when it was at its worst. I believe that this allows fellow OC’ers to recognize that they are not alone.
It was bad. Really, really dark, low times. I’ve tried to detail in a few places on this blog. Check out:
* What It Was Like
* The Darkest Days
* A Portrait of Uncertainty
* OCD & Suicidal Thoughts
* What It Feels Like (yes, this is different than the first link!)
But let’s not end on a downer note, friends. There’s no reason to. Because there IS a treatment for OCD and it WORKS. After twenty years in bondage to OCD, twelve weeks of exposure therapy loosed my chains. The last nine years have been different in every way from the twenty before them. If you can relate to any of the post above, then why not start here with my message of hope to OCD sufferers?
If you have questions, you’re welcome to ask here. Anonymous questions are fine!
JACKIE LEA SOMMERS 
Excellent post, Jackie, which sums up everything we need to know about OCD! Thanks for all you do ti help those with the disorder and I wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas!
Thanks, Janet! Merry Christmas to you too!
Are you still there? I really need someone to talk to. Please don’t reveal my name and email.
Hi dear one, these days I am trying hard to respond publicly to people’s questions, so if you’d like to submit a question, feel free to click the blue door “ASK ME ANYTHING” graphic at http://www.jackieleasommers.com and ask it there. It can be anonymous. I have lots of HOCD resources at http://www.jackieleasommers.com/OCD. I sure hope you will submit an anonymous question so everyone can benefit. I can’t reply via private email, and I’m not able to diagnose anyone. Blessings!
Hi dear one, these days I am trying hard to respond publicly to people’s questions, so if you’d like to submit a question, feel free to click the blue “ASK ME ANYTHING” door at http://www.jackieleasommers.com and ask it there. It can be anonymous. I have lots of HOCD resources at http://www.jackieleasommers.com/OCD but I can’t diagnose anyone. If you’d submit a question, I’d be happy to answer it on my blog though!
I will connect you with a former HOCD sufferer. Shoot me an email at jackieleawrites@gmail.com.
I just wanted to take some time to say thank you. You don’t know me, and you likely never will but I would say your website saved me. Typical OCD story: I was just chatting with a friend when she went to get something and suddenly the thought hit me, “What if I’m gay?” Naturally I tried to dispel this thought and I tried to block it out. Without realizing it I had started avoiding my friends faces (my closest friends are also female). I obsessed, ruminated, paced and had a few anxiety attacks. I tried talking it through with a friend, and if it hadn’t been (as I think it is) OCD, the discussion likely would have helped. Instead it got me into the habit of reassuring myself. A few sleepless nights, extra anxiety from exams and this recurring, distressing thought later, I was very irritable. This isn’t really a topic I can speak to my parents about, so naturally I googled it. I googled something along the lines of: “obsessed with being gay but knowing your straight”. It led me to one of your HOCD posts, and then I read through all of them. I realized OCD was likely the culprit considering the previous summer I was constantly afraid of dying due to a heart attack or stroke. The winter break of that year, grade 9, I had become obsessed with dying and what happens after death. I also unwittingly used ERP to control these fears. The first time, I realized that I was not going to commit suicide, and the only way to know what happens after you die is to die. So I might as well enjoy my life right now instead of worrying, especially because I only get one life (this came after anxiety, loss of appetite, feeling distant, lack of sleep and constant ruminating). The episode over summer kind of just faded away. There were a few more short episodes like the fear of not enjoying reading (I absolutely love to read), to which my eventual response was that if I didn’t enjoy reading I would find something else to do and it would not be the end of the world. I also had brief time worrying about being Christian (I practice a different religion), which seems ridiculous to me now because religion is your choice and you believe what you believe. Anyway I had no idea this would be considered OCD behavior until I found this website. I did some research and realized I probably did develop OCD. I haven’t told my family, or gotten diagnosed but researching ERP and implementing some techniques as well as trying to let the thoughts be there is helping. I did tell my friends, who are very supportive about the possibility of OCD as well as the possibility of being homosexual. Now I am 16, have been fighting what is likely HOCD for about 7 months and I started a blog to give my mind something else to focus on. None of that would have been possible if I hadn’t stumbled on this blog. Thank you again for having the courage to share your experiences! It has helped me a lot! I wish you a very Merry Christmas and hope you have a great year!
Zyphira, you are the sweetest. Thank you, dear one. Proud of you.
Hi Jackie,
Does HOCF cause you to take enjoyment out of the favorite activities that you used to have? Plus, could insecurities aggravate HOCD? Also, thank you so much and what other resources can I read about HOCD and ERP, I looked at the message boards and they seemed too contemptuous for my liking.