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Due to an overwhelming number of emails about OCD, HOCD, ERP, and the like, I am no longer able to respond to personal messages about these matters; I’m not a therapist, and though it honors me that you’d share your story with me, I’ve found that I am not in a place where I can handle such stories in a healthy way. I invite you to read my message to you at It is everything that I would say to you in an email. I wish you all the best as you pursue freedom from OCD. Godspeed.

9 thoughts on “Contact

  1. At age 8 or 9 I remember lying on a bed looking out the window to a crisp blue autumn sky through leafless tree branches wondering if what I saw was all there was: Thinking, believing, that a block away the people I knew who lived there did not exist yet, and more importantly, wouldn’t exist until I geographically walked to that place itself; as though the world around me was being created only as I move through it.

    Maybe it would be like moving about on the holodeck on Star Trek. Like you are actually existing in a small mind-bubble that can only realistically relate with/to an immediate environment of a few hundred feet or so. As I proceed to move about it is like my perception is a spot light with a 200 foot radius and an ‘apparent’ emerging reality is created for me as I move my radius of awareness further beyond perimeters (while deleting, subtracting where I’ve been behind me…like Google Earth!)

    Life becomes like a perpetual perception consumption cycle (ppcc) as moments in time and space shift effortlessly. I notice a problem only arises when I want to attach to a perception cycle longer than nature would have it. Buddhist meditators know this sensation well, the craving and aversion.

  2. Is there an email address where I can reach you? I have struggled with scrupulosity for 18 years and am looking to start ERP soon and have some questions. Thank you!

    • Hi Lindsay! I’m so sorry to hear about your struggle with scrupulosity! I can completely relate after a 20-year struggle. Right now, I’m closed to emails (due to a need for some boundaries and re-charging), but I’ve put everything that I would tell you in an email on my website at I hope you’ll read it– the entire thing– and then act!

      • Thank you so much. I will do that. I can tell you already, your site has been a gift to me from God, a SERIOUS answer to prayer. This disorder is so lonely, so terribly, horribly isolating, and it is so amazing and hopeful to see someone who has gone through it and come through on the other side. I am starting ERP on Monday, and probably 80% of that decision is because of your posts.

        Thank you, thank you, thank you.

  3. Hi I’m 14 and I think I have hocd but I don’t know I took a test on ocd site had 20 of 29 symptoms but I have doubts cause I never been to a doctor to diagnose me which makes me think I’m in denial which scares me cause I don’t want to be gay when I have thoughts of those images I feel sick, I threw up the first night of those thoughts please help me I’ve prayed every night to not be gay I can’t tell my parents this. I don’t understand erp, if I am gay I told myself that I would never marry and just live alone maybe adopt a kid of something cause I want to go to heaven I have had girlsfriends in the past but none in 7th grade

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